Saturday, August 13, 2005


Okey Dokey. I've avoided it all summer. I've even written it down a few times and decided that it's just not blog material. But I can't take it anymore. And, since today was my last day (HURRAH!), here ya go.

Retail Rant:

First, let me preface this by saying that I FIRMLY believe that EVERYONE should have to work in some sort of retail/service/food establishment for at least six months, early in their life/work, so that they understand HOW TO TREAT PEOPLE.

Rules of Retail Etiquette (sp?):
1. Treat "the help" like you would like to be treated. If you are rude to me, don't be surprised when I don't bend over backward to help you.
2. Remember, we are here to provide you a service, not to wipe your ass. We cannot read your mind, change policies, etc at our whim. Don't ask.
3. If I say "It's store policy" don't ask me why. I didn't create the rules. My job is to enforce them (if need be) and follow them. Period. I cannot change something for you. You are not special. And don't you understand that if I make an exception for you, I have to make that exception for the person behind you who just heard you get away with something?
4. It is not MY fault if we do not have something in stock. Please do not take it out on me. See Number 1 and 2 for further clarification.
5. Please, please, please respect the other customers in the store. DO NOT walk up to the cash register as I am helping another customer and butt in and ask a question. It is NOT YOUR TURN. I know you would be quick to complain if someone did it to you, so please, don't do it to someone else. Find another employee to harass, or wait until I am finished with the customer in front of me.
6. When it is your turn at the cash register, please be ready to check out. Taking five minutes to decide if you want an item while others are waiting is RUDE. So is taking five mintues to find your money/credit card/checkbook. Be prepared.
7. DO NOT be offended when I ask to see your ID when paying by check. It is REQUIRED. Additionally, do not YELL at me when I ask to see your ID when you pay with an UNSIGNED credit card. Hell, it was our store's policy to ask EVERYONE for their ID if they were paying by credit card. We're trying to keep YOU safe. And, to the particularly bi**hy customer last week, it IS NOT illegal to ASK for your ID. So back off.
8. DO NOT tell me how to do my job. Would you like it if I came to your house and criticized how you raised your kids? Who works here? Who do you think knows more about where items are shelved, you or me? And I don't care if you don't agree with our placement of an item. I'm just here to tell you where to find it.
9. Try to find an item first. God gave you a brain. When you had a kid did you ask the doctor where it's butt was? No, you LOOKED FOR IT. I am happy to help if you have made a good faith effort. But walking in the door and asking where a section is that is RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU is just LAZY.
10. Finally, do not assume that just because I am working at said establishment I am somehow beneath you. You know nothing about me. You assume that I am some dimwit who can't find their own butt to wipe, instead of someone who has worked retail for TEN years, who has a vast knowledge of what they are selling, and, to top that all off, is about to finish not one, but TWO master's degrees. So put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Rant over. No exciting knitting content today. Trying desperately to finsh DH's socks before Birthday Week begins tomorrow. More on that later.

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